Happy New Year!
I try to write a new year reflective post every year to post on January 1 since I actually started this blog on New Year’s Day 2009. But dah well, didn’t happen.
I actually wasn’t sure when I was going to blog again because I really had no desire to at all. Today’s song brought me out of my hiatus I suppose.
I declared 2011 the “year of friendships” and I successfully actualized that goal. Last year I spent time nurturing and loving those close to me, and I will continue that in 2012. It wasn’t the easiest year emotionally: I spent more time than necessary doubting myself, confused about the actions of others, and just all around a bit more unsure than I had been in my personal life in a long time. DESPITE all of that, I had some REALLY good times. I finally found my footing in a new city, and had one hell of a summer. I turned 30 years old, which ushered in the fall season in style as I celebrated with loved ones and have memories that will last a lifetime.
The last month of 2011 was probably the hardest of all, as I lost a very close friend of mine to complications from Sickle Cell. I had never lost a close friend before and its still very hard for me to accept at times, but we said our final farewell, in this lifetime last Wednesday.
My heart is still heavy, but my spirit is no longer unsure. She is Home, she is no longer in pain, and knowing that makes me smile. And even through the tears, I DO SMILE.
While doing my morning rituals this morning, I happened upon the Steve Harvey Morning Show, and as soon as I heard the horns come in on this song, my eyes filled with tears. This was OUR song, one in particular I avoided listening to since I first heard my Cryssy left this earth. I wanted to share it with you all today because despite how it makes me miss her so, it is an excellent song. It is a song I have always loved. At first it reminded me of my childhood, but from now on it will remind me of her.
She and I bonded in many ways, but one way in particular was through music. She also was a regular reader and commenter of my blog. Today’s post, and song is for Cryssy. in 2011 we spent lots of time together, and I’m grateful for those experiences, those moments. The last was at her 32nd birthday party. I let her know how much she means to me, and for that I have no regrets. This extended version (our favorite) is just for you.
I may be just a foolish dreamer But I don't care 'Cause I know my happiness is waiting out there somewhere I'm searching for that silver lining Horizons that I've never seen Oh I'd like to take just a moment and dream my dream Dream my dream... Zoom I'd like to fly far away from here Where my mind is fresh and clear And I'd find the love that I long to see Where everybody can be what they wanna be I'd like the greet the sun each morning And walk amongst the stars at night I'd like to know the taste of honey in my life Well I've shared so many pains And I've played so many games But everyone finds the right way Somehow Somewhere Someday...