The Soundtrack of My Life

the music that keeps me going…

Necessary Commentary, Pt. 2: Love Songs

Part 2 of Necessary Commentary: Love Songs

Reecie: “Mary’s Joint” I think actually fits well as a follow up to Badu. If the term “recovering undercover over lover” was thought of in 1994, I’m sure Mary would’ve stamped it as her title as well.

LaBakir: She sure would’ve.  It took that woman a minute to get over K-Ci.  I’ve actually have no recollection of ever hearing this song.  The production is classic 90’s R&B.  Especially the  percussion.

Reecie: “I know that you’re just a man, but you’re all the man I need…” from the opening line, I want to throw my hands in the air. As we all know that My Life is Mary’s most coveted release by her fans, dating back to a tumultuous time in her life. We can speculate that every single song is about her off and on again relationship with K-Ci from Jodeci. The type of destructive, confusing, intense love that many of us may not have experience to that extent, but still we can relate. This CD came out when I was in high school, and you couldn’t tell me back then that everything was REAL and deep and so SERIOUS. lol. Every relationship was! ha.

LaBakir: Mary definitely makes that hand waving music.  Although this is one of her more laid back songs vocally, the lyrics are still very “real”.

Reecie: Even still as an adult I revisit these songs and they are still relevant in my life. I like this song because its one of the most underrated on the CD, but lyrically it’s so telling, so pleading. “You promised that you never would cheat or lie, lie to me, don’t lie to me babe. And you promised that you’d trust and believe in me, please believe in me”

LaBakir: If her repetition isn’t a sign of her sincerity, I don’t know what is.

Why can’t we work it out? My baby can we try? You said our love would always stand the test of time.” At the end of the song for almost two minutes those lyrics are repeated.  I think it displays her desperation and the craziness she was experiencing at the time.  She wants answers that she probably won’t get.  But when you’re experiencing that crazy kind of love, you’ll keep trying… and repeating until you’re blue in the face.

Reecie: Mary has never been the best singer to me, but she’s my favorite female artist simply because of the raw emotion. She’s begging him and trying to convince herself at the same time. She wants to go, but no. She’s gonna wait. Yes. She’s willing to wait for him to come to his senses. To remember the things he’s told her–they will move forward together. Even better than before. This sometimes works, but almost always doesn’t. Even still, she’s hopeful because it just hurts too much not to be.

LaBakir: It’s as if the pain and hurt (although toxic) was so familiar to her…she’d rather stay around and try to change that than leave and explore other options.  As a Taurus, I can relate to that type of stubborn resilience…but sometimes you just gotta know when to let it burn.  Not everybody is worth your efforts, ya know?

Reecie: Now moving on to more romantic side of love. First of all, I think Tamia is extremely underrated. Ever since I first heard her on Q’s Jook Joint I’ve been a fan of her voice. This song is syrupy sweet to me. I think it’s a good wedding song, even though it describes everything about a relationship up until that point (the good things). I mean how can you not LOVE “When it comes to you I wouldn’t change a thing, I wouldn’t even change the things I could change. Cause baby you’re perfect, perfect to me. Simply means that you are perfect for me. You’re the answer to a prayer I haven’t prayed….”

LaBakir: This is my first time hearing this song as well.  And syrupy is an understatement. The lyrics will give you diabetes.  It’s definitely an over-the-top kind of love song.  Sort of unrealistically beautiful, ya know?  I mean this chick is head over heels with dude and definitely has created some well thought out scenarios.  But that’s what love will do to ya.

Reecie: “You’re the answer to a prayer I haven’t prayed?!” Whooo baby! That’s something special right there. From beginning to end, this song does it for me. But what can I say, I’m a hopeless romantic.

LaBakir: I can be a hopeless romantic as well Reecie.  But I must say, I’m not impressed with Tamia’s vocals.  I KNOW she can sang.  “You Put a Move on My Heart” is the perfect example.  Or the joint with Eric Benet “Spend My Life with You”. I just wish she would’ve displayed more of her talent instead of this Janet Jackson-esque singing.  I think it would’ve added a little more “substance” to the lyrics.  On second thought I suppose her vocals compliment the production. #shrug

Reecie: This song speaks on many “firsts” of a relationship. The giddy things that are part of “The Newness” tm Eric Roberson. The first kiss, the first time someone says ‘I love you’, the first time meeting the parents, etc. I know that we all have been enthralled with the newness at some point or another, but this takes it a step further only because it’s like she’s having a premonition–or maybe its just wishful thinking. The cynic in me (I’m a Libra, so there’s that conflict) thinks she’s kinda being presumptuous. “I hope that it’s the last first time I say I love you. Hope that it’s the last first, time you say you love me too” I mean all that? But yeah. ALL.THAT. I am also at a point in my life that I don’t really date for fun/leisure so “If you just wanna kick it, then you’re wasting my time, cause my plan is to not just have a hit and quit” suits me perfectly. But I do believe there is some space between THAT, and being betrothed, but that’s me!

LaBakir: Ha! Whether wishful thinking or well thought out scenarios, she definitely paints a picture. Call her Picasso.  But seriously, as you kind of touched on…it seems as though she’s getting a little too far a head of herself.  Though the sentiment is sweet and kind, the lyrics never elude to how her man feels.

And I can totally relate to “If you just wanna kick it, then you’re wasting my time,cause my plan is to not just have a hit and quit”. I’m at a point where I’m not interested in any games, yet I’m not trying to marry the first man that comes along.

Reecie: Also because I’m a geek, I try to imagine Tamia singing this to Grant Hill.

LaBakir: *giggles* I can see her singing to him too.  This is definitely a wonderful wedding song, but not something to play for your dude while still in the dating phase.  It may send him running for the hills. Lauren Conrad.

The end.

Good times! What do you think about my choices? Are you familiar with them? I literally sorted my iPod and pulled them from the top played songs played. I had to resist not using any Raheem DeVaughn, since I play so much of his stuff.

Asking for your favorite love songs would be too broad (I’m sure we call could go on forever and ever) but maybe others from the artists we featured: Jackson 5, Erykah Badu, Mary J. Blige & Tamia? Let me know in the comments. 🙂


I Choose Me


 I’ve been looking for THE SONG all day that would motivate my writing. and I’ve found it.

When talking to people about my life I often mention that I used to be really selfish. Well I’ll say Im not REALLY selfish anymore, just kinda selfish. But its not that I didn’t care about other people, I just cared about me a LOT more. *kanye shrug*

I am an only child and I heard my entire childhood and adolescence how thats the reason why I’m selfish, and how completely horrible it is. As a kid, I didn’t want to share my toys with my cousins–or if I did, it was only CERTAIN toys.

I was spoiled and had tons of toys, and it could be a game I hadn’t played with for months, but let so in so pick that one and NO! you can’t have that.  one of the reasons I want to have more than one child–please, be better than me. be required to share on a regular basis, which I was not. I spent a lot of time alone, everything had a place and was readily available when I wanted it. I actually spend a lot of time alone now. hmmm.

But despite all of that, I had to learn to share. and I still don’t really like it, I mean like I said, I’ll do it, but certain things, no–you can’t drink up my Simply Apple juice if you stay at my house. I’m sorry, but that’s my shit and its not cheap.   You CAN have some Tropicana though! let me stop- I dont’ even buy Tropicana any more, and THAT shit is OD expensive too. lol. why is juice like damn near 4 dollars? ugh. Funny thing is I want whatever it is YOU have, I want it and don’t want to be told no. lmao. SHARE WITH ME!!!I only do this with food, btw–but I told yall I’m greedy right?

I talk to or read about/watch talk shows about people who have let themselves go, don’t know how to care about themselves; saying they have always looked out for other people first, neglected themselves and I don’t get that. I mean, I GET IT, but its never been my reality. I love people, I care deeply. I’m a Libra, I thrive in relationships and enjoy a kinship with others. People I’m close to know that. Will I give you the shirt off my back? yes if I’m wearing a cami underneath or if not I’ll give you another shirt–I have sevaral. Call me what you want, but I’ll be warm, and you will be too.

Everytime you get on a plane and the flight attendant tells you in the event of an emergency, the air masks will drop, and you must SECURE YOUR MASK FIRST, before helping others. Whats the point trying to be captain super save a ho and you can’t breathe? there is NO point thats what. you aint saving nothing, chest all puffed out, outta breath, looking foolish.

ok, so anyway the song. Tamia’s “Me”. I loved Between Friends–totally slept on CD and I mentioned awhile back she was one of the folks I had been missing. Now my prayers have been answered with this super group with Tamia, Deborah Cox and Kelly Price? eh, not sure I’m buying it yet. I mean LSG were great solo but together they really didn’t do it. I mean I liked that song “My Body” and even had their cd– Columbia House baby! so we’ll have to see about that.

some lyrics for  you:

And she told me to tell you to never to hurt me again
Cuz if you haven’t heard she’s a bad chick
Even though I haven’t been, no
Yet and still you try and test me by raisin’ an angry hand
Put it down, put it down

I’m leavin don’t try and stop me, (no)
I’m late and she is waiting, (yes)
My love for me is too much so I can’t stay

And her name is me,
And she loves me more than you’ll ever know
And I finally see that loving you and loving me
Just don’t seem to work at all
So patiently, she’s waiting on me to tell you
That she needs love
And to choose between you two, boy you know
If I have to choose, I choose me.

so, I understand I may be in the minority when it comes to self preservation, but its been a part of me since forever–but for others, there’s nothing wrong with being selfish, IMO. Care about YOU. love you, love others, but love yourself MORE. you aren’t any good to anybody else giving and giving and giving all of you away. you gotta keep a bit of you JUST FOR YOU. And if you’re like me, you keep a lot of things just for you–which may not be the best, but shit I’m happy. And I have a lot of love, amongst other things to share. 🙂 The song is talking about a romantic relationship,  but I say in most cases in life–outside of your children, they matter more; I choose me first.


I miss you…

its been too long

since you’ve been gone

feels good when I’m with you

I miss you

I need your smile

ain’t seen you in awhile

I’m so alone I miss you….

Vodpod videos no longer available.

What happened to Monifah? that used to be the jam. Was she a Heavy D protege’? I heard Now That We Found Love yesterday on the radio on the old school lunch mix and was jamming tooo hard in my car! that’s my fave Heavy D song. that and black coffee no sugar no cream! I miss Heavy. I miss Monifah. I got to thinking today at work about artists that I miss…just random, like where is SHE at? (behind that preposition, I know). Who remembers the Monifah remix with AZ? *sigh* music was soooo much better then.

Here’s my list:

Vivian Green–I’on even know where my girl’s been hiding, but I wish we could go back…or come back rather.  just do something!!!

Monica- I know she’s been seen everywhere, and has a duet with Keyshia Cole, where she clearly outshines her in the song and the video, but I want some solo material…

Amy Winehouse–just get your life together and make some music, I mean damn. I’m tired of seeing pictures of you looking crazy in these streets! I mean, what kind of fuckery is this?! do better, ma!

Amerie–Because I love it. that’s all, no other explanation needed. I think I love Amerie as much as I love Teedra.

Faith Evans–I read her book earlier this year and just miss everything about her….I think this was the last Faith song I really really loved..

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Corinne Bailey Rae-I know her voice annoys a lot of people, but I really like it and I liked her first CD.

Eve–I mean do I even have to go into it? I just saw this horrible new Lil Kim video yesterday (hadn’t heard the song before seeing the vid) and I just want a female rapper to do better. NO, I want specifically Eve to do it.  I’m over Kim….

Kelis–I mean she’s with child and going thru a divorce so maybe I’ll have to wait a little bit longer….just as long as she gets back with Neptunes….if not she can keep it.

Tamia–Its only been what 3 years since Between Friends but it was great. I loved it, I want you to come out and get your due!!!! Last First Kiss is like oh-em-gee, its a fantabulous song!!!

Jazmin Sullivan–I know the CD just came out but can I get a video…that doesn’t suck? I don’t miss you  quite yet, but I feel like you kinda are fading to black. I’on know. Just a feeling I get…

Beyonce–because you know I haven’t seen you in so long. didn’t you get married a year ago? where have you been my dear? *rolls eyes* I would love for you to go on tour or something soon to give us a sneak peek of what’s coming next…..a movie maybe….

there are tons of other women making great music that you just don’t see anymore…I think the universe has an unwritten rule that you have to rotate about 4 or 5 mainstream singers at a time… long as Beyonce always remains a constant–she’s like the big joker in your spades hand. you know you set if you have her right? I kid…. throw MJB  in the mix every 3 years or so, someone like Ciara or Rihanna to be edgy but still compared to Beyonce…you know to just keep hoes in their place,  and then Keyshia fills the hood quotient.

Do we have any female versions of cornballs like Pleasure P and Bobby V? hmmmm. Christina Milian is trying to make a comeback but I just don’t see it. Dip it Low is her only hit. Go back to making movies boo! and that blond hair? “you look bad gurl”. She used to be my body role model….her cute shape is soooo being ignored by the hideous clothes and horrible hair.

I don’t want to post the awful picture on my blog, but I’m speaking of this here.

Can some of my favorite singers come back? please….I don’t ask for much these days…and I don’t bitch and whine if I don’t get my way…..

I just want something fresh, from the people I like. thats all. I mean I can spend days listening to old Monica Faith Evans (as they have the largest catalogs), but I’d rather discover something new, ya know?

yes, she wants neo soul, this hip hop is old, she don’t want no rock and roll…..